Worry gives a small thing a big shadow- Swedish Proverb

So the Alien went to the doctor today and thankfully Big Papi had the opportunity to attend because he is usually working when the kids go to the doctor.

I think fathers have figured out ways to get out of the haircuts, doctors, dentists appointments. Well I really shouldn’t say that because Big Papi is always willing to help out if I ask. I think that is the bigger problem; I am the one who has to arrange for things.

I am the concierge of my household if it is a reservation I am the one making it happen. Now, I know I could ask Big Papi to do the arranging but again I have to ask. This is a huge gap between fathers and mothers, because fathers really only care that the kids are breathing (and even that is questionable when in the middle of the night I will stay awake a creep over to the crib to ensure that the Alien is still breathing while Big Papi snores away dreaming of Angelina Jolie). Big Papi is also very concern that the Caveman is not messing with the Big Papi’s stuff (I have to remind Big Papi that the Caveman is a boy, and therefore his DNA is imprinted with the desire to play with things that light up and have buttons).

I, on the other hand, am a constant bundle of nerves, concerns and issues over my children. Are they eating enough? Are they eating enough of the good things? How much television is okay for the Caveman? How can I convince the Caveman that mommy and him do not have to listen to endless cycles of “Skinnamarink” in the car on the way to pre-school? If the Alien is warm is she getting sick? Will my children look back on their childhoods and have more happy memories than sad ones?

The thoughts are constantly streaming across my mind and get worse when someone mentions another kid screwing up. I want to ask them, where did you make the wrong turn. Did it start when you let them watch too much Sesame Street? Do you indulge your child too much before realizing that you shouldn’t? Or was it when you started to not watch their every move and let them go on their own? These are the things I worry about as a mother.

I wish I could be more like Big Papi, relaxed and calm- but I think for a good parenting relationship you need someone who is awake in the middle of the night checking to see if the Alien is still breathing.